19 weeks

I am huge here I am at 19 weeks, Javier tells me "Mommy you big belly" hes three, he is undoubtedly right.

I am twice maybe even three times bigger with these twins then I ever was with Javier & Bostyn, next week Miguel and I are going to get a ultrasound hopefully we can find out what we are having TWO TIMES. I am stoked to get started on their room.

As for life right now it is completely chaotic it really is hard having 3 kids by yourself I have the utter most respect for people who do it. I am not saying Miguel is never here because he is but like always he works all the time but visits the kids when he can.

Bostyn said daddy the other day it made me so sad that Miguel wasn't around to hear it but I will have to get used to it, Javier always cries for Miguel at night, and Brooklyn always looks down they really miss him and so do I but I have to keep telling myself its for the best, I love him so much.

No more poor me I have the perfect children, beautiful house, amazing cars, and a amazing supporter even if we are not together it could be so much more disastrous but its not I am

grateful all the way to the sky and beyond.